Pick-Ups

I have a 1964 Chevy pick-up. It currently not working, and needs a few things for it to be restored, but i still like it. Its an awkward beige color that was done as a primer to be the base of the next color, but it never got its next color, so the beige is still there. I have some found memories in the truck. When I was younger I would sit on my dad's lap and "drive" the truck as we drove on long country roads. I can not remember a time when the horn of the truck ever actually working. It sounds like a deep voice of a donkey in need of a cough drop. I remember lying in the bed of the truck with my siblings looking at the stars in the sky as we drove off to a family members house. Once when I was driving with my father, the passenger door slipped open and I was slipping out (because I was smaller and the safety belt was not too tight around me) and while driving, my dad grabbed my shirt and saved me. (He's my hero!) My favorite memories were hearing that horn everyday as my dad came home from work and parked in our parking lot, and I would hide with my nerf gun waiting for him to come find me so I could shoot him. It was my favorite part of the day. I've had many memories in my little pick-up.

I originally began this post writing about a different sort of pick up. After a couple things have not gone my way recently, so i've been bummed a bit. I needed something that could pick me up get me excited about life again. My mind drifted to my pick-up that sits at home, waiting for me to get the money to fix it, and all the memories I had in it. As this happened, my spirits were lifted and I got the pick up I needed. Sometimes reminiscing on past good memories can be some of the best pick ups for a person feeling a bit bummed out.

One to Celebrate, the Other to Remember

Today is a double anniversary. One for celebrating, the other for remembering. Allow me to explain...

One for remembering: 10 years ago today, a great friend of mine passed. I was fortunate to know this man. I was close enough that I could learn, speak, and be with him; yet I was far enough that I was unable to see him in his down times, his flaws, his weaknesses. I was able to see him when he made the right decisions. In my mind he was perfect in almost every way and he was an example for me. I spent time with him and he became my mentor, friend and brother. Much of who I am, how I act and who I spend my time with is because of him. This man took part in naming me, but he never used my name only referring to me endearingly as his best friend. I was able to spend 10 years learning from this man. He is someone that I strive to be, and will continue to learn from even beyond the grave. I love him. Thank you for being a part of my life, even if it was for a moment.

One for celebrating: One year ago today, I became myself. This might be hard to understand, but I celebrate this day because I overcame the shadow that hovered above my head. I was able to shed the weight that held me down for the most part of my life. Since then I have been able to shape myself into the man that I want to be, without the pressure looming around. Many people may understand what it is like to have unlawfully placed expectations upon them, and the struggle that comes with it all. That was what was upon me. I was able to overcome by outlasting the unbearable weight. I work my way around it by surviving longer than the pressure did. I am spending this day on correcting on reflection of myself and looking to see where I am, and where I'll be going. I'll be celebrating because I am free.

These two happenings are will have a continual impact on my life, especially because they are connected by this date. I am becoming myself through reflection, refinement by the Lord, and reaching for the standard that a friend once set for me. I am celebrating and remembering.

Cliche` Lines #2

"Character is who you are when no one is looking!"

This one has always made me think because there are few moments in a day when no one is looking. I currently live in the city, with four other guys. It fun and exciting, but there are not too many times in the day when I am alone. Most of the time I have someone with me when I'm cooking, cleaning, walking to class or doing whatever; and if I am alone, I call someone to see if they want to spend time with me. So when is no one looking? When i'm in the bathroom...when i'm sleeping in my room (hopefully)...when I'm the first to get back home and the others aren't back yet? What I do during those moments is my character? Not at all. I believe that character is defined when people are around, looking, staring with their full attention on you. Character is the decisions you make when people are relying on you, watching to see what you do. I watched the movie "The Town" and there was a scene where the robbers are loading their money into a car and a cop happened to be right across the street looking at them. There was an awkward 10 seconds where they just look at each other, before the cop slowly turns his head the other way and the thieves pack their car and leave. If that movie was real, that cop's character was defined once he made the decision to turn his head away and not call for any help or do anything to stop the men. The thieves had their eyes on him waiting to see what he would do. That was his moment, to do what he was trained to do. But he failed. In my life my character is defined by actions and words. If I say that I am going to do something for someone, or be there for someone, I need to be there otherwise my character is going to say that I am someone that cannot be relied on. Character is made when people are watching and a person makes a decision to do something. Whether its radical by coming to defense of someone, or passive by simply walking away. Character is made in almost every decision, when people are around, watching, waiting for you to choose.

Jessica's "Daily Affirmation"

I am not one of those people that spends hours on Youtube watching dumb, funny videos. But every once in a while, I am shown a video that I enjoy, and if I really like it, I tell everyone about it shamelessly. Sometimes others like it and it becomes a big deal in my inner circle, other times, I am the only one that seems to enjoy it. Recently I watched a video about a little girl who encourages herself while looking at herself in the bathroom mirror. She goes off saying things that she likes: her family, house, hair, aunt, cousins. Then she say that she can be different things. The cuteness level is high on this girl, being four at the time of recording. The level of astonishment that I have from this little girl is very high! I believe that I should take up the habit of this girl and encourage myself every morning. it only takes a few moments in the morning. I'm every morning, I see the mirror in the bathroom, why shouldn't I do it. Steve Carell's character in Evan Almighty also gave himself a morning affirmation every morning. It brightened his day, made him a bit more optimistic about what was happening the rest of his day, he was more confident. For the next two weeks I will be write out a short affirmation for myself, look in the mirror, and say it. I want to see if i feel better on days I say it than days I don't. This is going to be fun!

The Disappearance of Friends

I have been blessed by being surrounded by a great group of friends. Unfortunately, my quest for adventures takes me away from the ones I bond closely with, and I am not able to be around them. I am at a position where I am near many people that I once recognized as my closest friends. Some of them I haven't seen in a few months, others more than a year. But for some reason, it seems that I have lost connection to many of them. They have a new experience of life that I am no longer apart of. While I lived in my mountain home, my friends in the city were living their own life. Though I was in a small community waiting for the day that I could go back and see them all again, they were in a large community where I was replaced with another who was more available to them. It seems weird going from close friends living next to one another, and after a few months time, becoming almost strangers. Perhaps I held them to dear to my heart? Or maybe it is the separation was to strong and outlasted our patience to wait for one another. Maybe absence doesn't make the heart grow fonder, but out of sight, out of mind...

New Beginnings 20 & 11

A New Year, a fresh semester, a birthday! Things seem to be starting anew for me. My birthday and the start of my semester back on the main campus of my school (after being "abroad" for the past two semesters) happen to be on the same day. The combination of these two events made that day delightful for me. I would say that it is interesting though having so many new beginnings for myself all at the same time. It occurred to me that I am making an adjustment in my life. I am going to a school that almost seems new to me after being away for so long and not having set solid roots before i left, and now at a new age there are new responsibilities to tackle because of the responsibility that comes with another year of life. Great power may come with great responsibility but the more life I live, the more I am responsible. My life isn't only about me, like it was when I was a child. I'm growing, learning, living. Life throws me new challenges and I no longer cry immediately to my father or mother for help. I rely on what I've been taught, to God and learning to trust those around me. I'm not alone in this new beginning, just in a new position.

New Years

I've celebrated the coming of the New Year in different ways. When I was young I could be found spending time with family, as I got a bit older I would join my parents in going to church, after that I went to New Year's Parties with friends, I even spent one New Year's Eve alone in bed because I was ill. All had their different type of fun that I enjoyed. But I believe the one celebration that I hold dear to my heart was a simple one I had with my older brother during a noisy church service.
The speaker of the night was giving the word to welcome in the new year. The church was rejoicing, jubilant in every way. Shouting and singing, praising God while dancing, it was hot in the building. But the comical part of this celebration was that it was early, too early. The speaker did his countdown of 10 to 1 in seconds, but in between each number he would tell a story of speak more about the New Year blessings. So his countdown of 10 seconds took more like 30 minutes. But even though that took longer to announce, he was still off on his timing. About 15 minutes. Thats not to bad, just funny, there was no clock in the church sanctuary so no one would really know the truth, unless they would look at their watches.
That is exactly what my brother did. He looked at his watch, which happened to have the exact time on it. (He liked to be precise with his timing) my brother grabbed me and took me to the back of the sanctuary, and showed me the time. He told me that the pastor was off but when the clock turns to midnight we can have our own celebration! I was excited. I loved my brother. We waited patiently for the clock to turn. Finally it came and we cheered and hugged each other. He picked me up, twirling me around as we said Happy New Year to each other. It was a joyous time we were having. My favorite New Year's celebration